For listeners

Listener Guide

Effective November 1, 2026 · Required reading for every listener

1. How to become a listener

1. Be 18 or older.
2. Read this guide, the Terms & Community Rules and the Privacy Notice.
3. Email listen@thelistenersguild.com with the answers to the questions below.
4. Complete a short practice conversation with an organizer.
5. Reply to our confirmation email with "I agree to the Listener's Pledge, the Listener Guide and the Terms." You then receive the Listener role on Discord.

Application questions

• The nickname and Discord username you'll use.
• Do you confirm you are 18 or older?
• Why do you want to be a listener?
• Tell us about a time you listened to someone without trying to fix their problem.
• Roughly when could you be available each week?
• Do you understand that listeners are volunteers, not professionals, and must not give clinical, legal or financial advice?

We may decline or remove any listener at any time. Listening is unpaid volunteer work and does not make you an employee or agent of the Guild.

2. How to listen

• Follow the tag. Just listen: reflect and acknowledge, no suggestions. Talk it through: ask open questions and let them find their own answers. Advice welcome: offer one idea, say it's your opinion, and don't push.
• Reflect what you hear. "It sounds like you're exhausted from carrying this alone."
• Ask open questions. "What's been the hardest part?" rather than yes/no questions.
• Let silence be. Pauses are fine. Don't rush to fill them.
• Avoid "at least…", "I know exactly how you feel", "everything happens for a reason", and long stories about yourself.
• Never diagnose or name medications, conditions or treatments. If someone wants that kind of help, encourage them to see a professional.

3. Boundaries

• Keep every conversation in the Guild's forum or voice rooms. No direct messages, other apps, phone calls or meeting in person.
• Never ask for or share full names, addresses, phone numbers, workplaces, photos or account details.
• No money, gifts, favors, romance, recruiting or promotion. Report anyone who asks.
• Do not keep notes, screenshots or recordings. When you debrief, leave out names and details.
• Keep what you hear to yourself, except as the crisis protocol requires.
• You may step away from any conversation that is too much for you. Say so kindly and ask another listener or a moderator to take over.

4. Crisis protocol

Use this whenever someone talks about wanting to die, harming themselves or someone else, being in danger, or saying goodbye. If in doubt, use it.

1. Stay with them. Don't end the conversation suddenly or go quiet. Stay calm and warm.
2. Ask directly. "Are you thinking about killing yourself?" Asking plainly does not put the idea in someone's head, and it helps them be honest.
3. Share help right away. "Please call or text 988 now. They're trained for exactly this. If you're in danger, call 911." Outside the US, point them to findahelpline.com.
4. Encourage them to reach out now, and offer to stay in the conversation while they do.
5. Alert a moderator in #mod-alerts with their username, the channel, the time and one line on what happened. No diagnosis, no extra detail.
6. If someone says they are in immediate danger and has shared where they are, call 911 (or the local emergency number) yourself, and report it to Discord's safety team. Tell a moderator you did.
7. Never promise to keep it secret, argue, debate whether their feelings are valid, give medical advice, or try to intervene in person.
8. Afterwards, debrief in #listener-lounge without names, and take a break.

For moderators: check #mod-alerts at the start of every shift and respond to automatic alerts by having a listener check in with the person in the same channel. Hide posts with graphic method details; don't delete the person's other posts unless they ask. Record what you did in one line in #mod-alerts.

5. Look after yourself

• Keep shifts to four hours or less, and take a short break at least once an hour.
• Use #listener-lounge to debrief, ask for help or hand off a conversation.
• If a conversation stirs up something hard for you, step away. That is part of the job, not a failure.
• If you need support yourself, use 988 or another resource. You don't have to be in crisis to call.